Product Review - Health Warrior Bars

"Disclaimer: I received Health Warrior Bars to review as part of being a BibRave Pro. Learn more about becoming a BibRave Pro (ambassador), and check out to review find and write race reviews!"

Hey Heifers! I've been having some fun lately trying out all kinds of new products... I want to talk with you today about something I absolutely LOVE and can no longer live without. My life is changed for the better. THERE'S NO GOING BACK!

I received two boxes of Health Warrior bars to try - Dark Chocolate and Apple Cinnamon.  I can't lie. I was skeptical. I'm ALWAYS skeptical.  Y'all know that about me, but love me anyway.

Thank you for loving me anyway.  Everyone just wants to be loved, right?  LOVE ME!  See? I have issues. Just love me.


Let's talk about the bars. They're not huge.  As someone who's lost over 110 pounds and successfully maintained this loss for 6 years... I analyze every single thing that goes into my mouth. Sometimes I analyze Costco buttercream icing as I shove it greedily down my face.  It's just the truth.  I know a few of you who are nodding in agreement, so don't judge.

So when I saw these, I was intrigued because the bars are "just enough" - they satisfy your hunger but don't leave you overly full like some of the larger protein bars. I felt compelled to do research. I am happy to report that I can fit exactly TWO bars into my mouth and still be able to answer the phone when my kids call.  you'rewelcome.

Also - let's discuss chia.  You either love it or you hate it, I think, according to what I hear around town.  Yes. I'll randomly ask people, "hey, you... what do you think of chia?" Mostly, I get strange looks but OCCASIONALLY someone into FITNESS (not fitness whole bar into my mouth..) will answer my question authentically.  And the consensus is... you love it or you hate it.

I wasn't sure which camp I was in - I've tried it a few times in my smoothies, trying to look cool with the other yoga moms.... then I realized I'm NOT cool like the other yoga moms. I don't have a messy bun done up just right... my butt doesn't look great in those yoga pants. I'm the reason people say LEGGINGS ARE NOT PANTS!  Legit. I am.

ANYWAY, where was I? 

Oh. The bars...I opened the dark chocolate bar first. I mean, who doesn't like a good dark chocolate flavored bar.  It was delicious.  Tasted kind of like a cookie, but with little chia bits that stay in your mouth for at least an hour after you eat it.  (Just being honest). It's the gift that keeps on giving.  You need a toothbrush after eating these bad boys.  TOTALLY WORTH IT.

The bars satisfy you perfectly. Not too big - not too little. Just right. I have begun eating one before my gym workouts as well as in between meals when I'm hungry and don't have time to prepare something fresh.

Let's have a look at them, shall we?


Yummy goodness.

Yummy goodness.


Here's a little info from their website, on the bars: 

Good source of fiber

•4-5g unrefined sugar

•100 calories

•100% real

•100% filling

•100% vegan

•No gluten

•No soy

•No dairy

I have to wholeheartedly agree with others who love these bars.  I didn't want to love them.. because I had a "favorite" go to bar.  But I fell in love with these.  And I've changed my facebook status to "in a relationship with..." Health Warrior bars. 

Do yourself a favor, heifers.  Get some.  So many flavors from which to choose.   Buy them all!  At least that's what I'm going to do!

You can follow Health Warrior on social media:

Twitter : @HealthWarrior

IG: healthwarrior


When you order your own bars, use this link to receive the very best, coolest coloring book of all time! (YES! A coloring book!


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SHE FIT - The Ultimate Sports Bra?

Hey heifers! What is it about me and sports bras?! I recently reviewed the ENELL SPORT bra and have been happily running along in my new fancy bra.  

Then a twitter friend messaged me and said, "Yeah, but have you tried SHEFIT....?" To which I said, "wait whaaaa?" I'd never heard of it. Maybe you haven't either.  I figured, what the heck, I'm willing to give it a try.  Let's face it. When you've got 34DDDs... you need to know ALL of your options, right? 

All options are good.  I can't saunter into WalMart and grab a 32A sports bra from the rack and go home happy.  I wish I could, y'all. Life would be so much easier and I think I'd have a million more dollars in the bank, given how expensive a GOOD sports bra is when you've got major melons.  Humungous Hooters.   Tremendous Tatas.  Don't make me go on. I had to google slang words for boobs.  It's not pretty.

I digress.  I do that a lot.

Imagine my excitement when SheFit messaged me and told me they'd be happy to send me a sports bra to try and review.  I was skeptical, as I usually am on these things.  I mean, I have this Enell bra. It's working for me. It's not super cute (definitely not a DATE NIGHT bra wink wink) but it gets the job done. It is one SERIOUS over the shoulder boulder holder. 

But if you have read my blog for a while y'all know I like CUTE things.

I want to be cute.

I want to be a styling heifer, running down the road feelin' fly about my funbags.  Feeling like if Ryan Gosling ran up to me and said "hey girl, show me your Bopsy Twins... I'd whip them out faster than my visa card at Christmastime.

Thus, I was pretty stoked when my Shefit bra arrived in the mail.  First impression up on opening - OH EM GEE, it's orange and pink.  Two of my favorite colors! Girdle-be-gone, this is a really CUTE bra.  I can rock this out for SHIZ!

Let's talk about ease of putting it on. It's great to look cute, but we well-endowed heifers KNOW that when we buy a new sports bra, it's going to burn some serious calories just GETTING INTO IT.  Can I get an amen?


Here's the thing on this bra.  It's VELCRO. The back closure is velcro, as are the shoulder straps.  This intrigues me because if you have heavy hooters, you KNOW that velcro makes you nervous.  Will it hold? Will it wash well?  How long before it disintegrates and I have to replace it.  This is all legit fear when you've got ginormo jugs.

Let's have a look at the bra, shall we? 

screen shots from their website

screen shots from their website

why don't my arms look that muscular?

why don't my arms look that muscular?

The hardest thing for me was putting the bra on.  This one is TRICKY.  Here's why.  I have carpal tunnel in my wrists.  My fingers just don't DO what they're supposed to, nor do my wrists cooperate.  The front zipper closure is a pain in the rear end (don't make me google 99 names for Uranus, ok?) Behind the zipper are clasps, as seen below.

Here's a view of it.


It's tricky because you're supposed to loosen the straps and then kind of tuck your tatas in and have at it.  Zip it up.  Well, easier said than done.  I couldn't make my hands/fingers work hard enough to zip it up.  I had to work REALLY hard to get the clasps shut first, then zip it.  The zipper then separated from the bottom, causing me to scream the F word really loud.  In fact so loud that it woke up my dogs.

They're lazy though.  They like to sleep past 4am. Whatever.  I had to put it on over my head (cue the circus music) because that was the ONLY way I could do it.  So I did.  I adjusted the velcro shoulder straps and went on my merry way.

Shoulder straps - all velcro

Shoulder straps - all velcro

Here's a look at the back strap, too. All velcro.

I can't lie. I'm skeptical of the velcro and its ability to last. I realize no bra should have a birthday.... but I am REALLY hoping this is quality velcro. I sweat a lot. This bad boy is gonna go thru many washings.

I can't lie. I'm skeptical of the velcro and its ability to last. I realize no bra should have a birthday.... but I am REALLY hoping this is quality velcro. I sweat a lot. This bad boy is gonna go thru many washings.

Once I had it securely fastened, like an airplane seatbelt... I wiped the sweat from my brow and got on with my day.  I met my friends at the park, whereupon I immediately pulled up my shirt to show them my new bra.  Hey.  We're chicks. That's what we do.  To my amazement, my friend Andrea lifts up her shirt and says HEY LOOK I HAVE ONE TOO!  Cue the laughter.  Bunch of girls, running at o'dark thirty at the park, all shining flashlights on their headlights.  Come on now.  Find the humor in this with me, please.

The BIGGEST plus of this bra is that the cups are padded. Ain't nobody got time for nipple parades. Nobody wants to see that, not me, not you (and if you do, eew, you need to go play on another website, not here).  Padded cups are where it's at.  

The cute-factor on this is pretty high-up also. It's HARD to find a great bra that supports the sisters, while still being cute.  This bra delivers.  I had my trusty running friends help me adjust the strap in the back so that it felt comfortably snug, and off we jogged, into the sunrise.

Final thoughts on this bra? Love it.  It's HARD to situate it if you're alone getting dressed without help (I have a shoulder injury which prevents me from adjusting the back strap once it's on) but if you can manage that - your colossal milk monsters (don't blame me, I learned that one from the internet) will stay locked and loaded, right where they belong.

Here's how it fits on a real woman, not a bra model.  The top zipper flap here is not pulled over the zipper just so that you could see how it looks.  The cup size could be a TINY bit bigger and I felt like maybe I was bulging out of it just a little - but beyond that - I will definitely wear this bra again for running and I would definitely recommend that you give it a try. Your cha-cha's will stay where they belong - no bouncing, no movement at all, and you'll never give them a second thought while you run off into your own sunrise or sunset.

The bra comes in several colors, which I also liked.  For all the information, check out their website at SHEFIT.COM and tell 'em I sent ya.

I believe the gray strips on front are reflective too.

I believe the gray strips on front are reflective too.

Me and Shefit. It's a match made in heifer-heaven.  I hope to get lots of bounce-free miles out of this bra.  If anyone wants to know what's on my holiday wish list --- this is for sure up at the top!

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Diary of a Heifer.... That Time You Lost Your Shit

It was bound to happen. It just was.

I'm seven days into training for the triathlon.  Seven.  That's really not a lot of days, is it? I have something like 140 days or so until this triathlon. In the Himalayan Mountains. I have 140 days or so to go from occasional runner / biker and OMGIHATESWIMMING to being a Badass Mountain Heifer Triathlete.

Yeah.  Don't laugh.  Ok you can laugh. Because I was laughing too. Right up until this morning.

Rest Day.  Yesterday's bike ride was for cadence.  Here's the thing - you work on revolutions per minute. I never knew that. IMNOTASEASONEDTRIATHLETE.  I never knew that was a thing.  Trust me. It's a thing. You start out low, at maybe 50rpm, then you go for a minute or two, take a minute or two break, and BAM, ramp it up for another minute. Go on to 60, then 70, then 80.  By the time you get to 80... here's what happens to you:

You die.  Twice.  I was feelin' pretty fly at 50, even 60.  By the time 70 hit me, I was getting a little concerned.  And when 80 came, I was ballz to the wallz.... and it got ugly.

Remember - I'm not quite the finely tuned athlete I hope to be in 20 weeks. NONE of this comes naturally to me. None of it.  I mean, yeah, the running is something I've done for 4 years now - but I'm not a natural.  I look like this:


Actually that heifer is probably a bit cuter LOL.  Her udders match her headband.  Let's move right past that statement.

I spent the last six days doing double and triple workouts each day.  Many of you Ironman finishers are nodding your head and telling me to STFU because this is the life when you train for an event.

Call me blissfully ignorant - I just didn't realize how much TIME and EFFORT were involved in training.  It's going to work out. I'm going to do it.  But this morning I awoke with paralyzing fear in the depths of my soul.  I awoke feeling the weight of a thousand heifers on my shoulders. The crushing pressure of being "The Head Heifer" and fearful that I might not finish. I might not be physically ABLE to bike up a damn mountain. And not just any mountain, heifers. THE HIMALAYAN mountains.  Those are some serious hills.

Here's what I did.  First, I made a horrendous video on and shared it on twitter. And hey, to the guy who said the bags under my eyes were unattractive, well.... I have a good personality, damnit! LOL WECAN'TALLBEPRETTY!!!! Here's that unattractive HONEST video. It's raw. I was holding back tears.  But whatever.  I'm going to share it for a good reason.

Ok now that you've witnessed the horror of the bags under my eyes and my unruly bedhead (don't judge, it's REST DAY, heifers, I'm resting), let me tell you this.  I shared it because we're all human.  Because no matter HOW HARD this is, and no matter HOW MUCH I want to freaking give up some days, because I'm exhausted mentally, physically, even emotionally... I WILL NOT GIVE UP.  I want to sometimes.  I do.  BUT I WILL NOT GIVE UP.

And neither should you. 

Fighting health issues? Diabetes? Obesity? Eating disorders? Relationship issues? Mental issues?  Giving up IS.NOT.AN.OPTION.  You fight.  You fight so hard until you have no more fight left in you.


That's what I'm doing.  And I invite you to fight alongside me for whatever it is that's important to YOU.  There is no giving up. 

#iKahn and #uKahn too.  Show me some love below.  I will need to read it on my next shit day. And if you need some support of your own, leave that below too. #heiferNation is strong and mighty.  #theHerd is here to support everyone.

That's how heifers roll. 



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