"ENELL SPORT" - THIS HEIFER'S SPORTS BRA REVIEW
Let's rally for a second. Let's all sit down, pull on our big girl panties, and talk honestly about something many people don't like to discuss openly: Boobs.
There. I said it. BOOBS. Say it with me: BOOOOOOBS. All women have them, in varying degrees. Not sure why it's so hush-hush when people talk about sports bras and such.
I am a well-endowed heifer. I don't hide this fact. It's just life. Much like Lady Gaga, "Baby, I was born this way!" Genetically, I got the moo-cow boobs. I just did. That's life. I roll with it. It's udderly ok with me (haha see how I did that, you guys?)
When I discovered that my beloved "go to" sports bra had been discontinued, you heftily hootered heifers can understand how panicked I became. When you have big 'uns you CANNOT just go to Walmart and buy any old sports bra.
Oooooh no. No way. It's just not a good idea.
Without the proper support of a good running bra, you're going to have issues. BIG issues. Bouncing. Jiggling. Back pain from lack of support. Did I mention the bouncing??? It's almost comical, but at the same time.... it's very serious and very PAINFUL to run without the proper support. Wearing two sports bras is just silly. Why? Much easier to find a bra that fits properly and holds "the girls" in.
So... when I reached out to my newest BFFs over at Enell after hearing how great their Sports Bra is --- I was excited when they responded almost immediately to me. They asked me for a few measurements, and said they'd be happy to send over some bras for me to review.
STOP THE PRESSES. WAIT A MINUTE.
Not only did they respond quickly - but it was on a Sunday. A SUNDAY. Who does that? I'll tell you who. Companies with amazing support. (haha, see, I did it again!)
Within a few days' time, I received not one but TWO shiny new sports bras in the mail. You can imagine my excitement at the thought of hunkering down the hooters and taking them for a test spin.
As with all my reviews - honesty is important. When I saw the two bras... I was a little taken aback. They resemble something from 1972 in terms of how they look in a package. (Think: your grandma's girdle) They are satiny looking. From the Enell website, about the material:
"NATUREXX® MOISTURE MANAGEMENT PERFORMANCE FABRIC – Fabric wicks away moisture to keep you cool during the most intense workouts."
The truth is - it's hidden. I don't run in only a sports bra. So, this is something I am happy to overlook because, well, when you've got ginormous jugs... your options are limited. Can I get an amen?
As many of you well-endowed heifers know, putting ON a sports bra is often an aerobic workout in and of itself, right? You have to contort your body and your shoulders in such a way that you're prone to injuring yourself just getting ready to run. TheStruggleIsReal.
Imagine my intrigue when I saw the bras - they have FRONT closures. Kind of like a corset - there are clips that you fasten all the way up. Enell was kind enough to send me a little tutorial on how to put them on without risking life and limb. You have to kind of fasten, stuff, re-arrange, and keep fastening.
It was a little tricky because when I'd get one clasp closed, the one beneath it would sometimes open up. Imagine this heifer, in the closet getting dressed at 4am, cussing a streak because every time I clasped one, the lower one came undone.
Eventually, though, it worked out. I blame a lack of alertness and coffee on some of my fumbling, and I also think after I do it a few more times, it'll get easier.
The bra itself fits SNUGLY. Just what you want in a sports bra. It's SUPER comfortable, despite fitting tightly. Check out their product photos, which I've taken from their website and compiled here for you:
The back of the bra is full coverage, which is great when you have excess boobage to support. Spaghetti straps don't lock and load the girls in the way they should. This is a sturdy bra for your girls. Trust me.
Fast forward... I arrive to the park and promptly take my tank top off to show my bra to all my heifer friends. No really. I did. We're a bunch of heifers. We share stuff. We dish. So I took my shirt off and demanded that they check out my bazingas.
Most of #theHerd that I run with is also well-endowed. They were intrigued. The bra fits pretty high up on your neck. Think: chastity belt for your boobs. It was definitely higher than any tank top I own - but again, it's a tradeoff. Support vs. vanity. You pick. This isn't a date-night bra, heifers. This is a LET'S GET SERIOUS ABOUT RUNNING bra. Thankfully I run in the beautiful pitch black peace of o'dark thirty, so there was no chance of someone seeing me and wondering "what's she got peeking out there from her tank top?" Nobody needs to be that close into my biz.
I began running and OH MY GOSH... my tatas stayed tucked. They did not go ANYWHERE. They were locked, loaded, and completely stationary on my entire run. I don't think I stopped talking about it THE ENTIRE RUN. I am still in shock and awe that I FINALLY found the BEST most SUPPORTIVE sports bra in the history of sports bras. I mean, if the pilgrims had been able to purchase these.... they'd have all been runners. I'm SURE of it.
The fabric that I wasn't really sure about... it definitely felt moisture-wicking, although it did take quite a while to dry after I got home and hung it up. I'm not sure if it holds the moisture longer because of the fabric, or maybe I just sweat like a heifer. Do heifers sweat? Someone google that and get back to me, mmmkay?
Bottom line? If you have heavy headlamps, mega-melons, etc... this is THE bra for you.
After realizing that I am now changing my Facebook status to "In A Relationship With Enell..." I asked them if they'd be generous enough to share a discount code with the HeiferHood. Guess what, y'all??? They were happy to pass along a discount!
Use discount code "theherd" at www.Enell.com through 10/15/17 for a 15% discount on your very own sports bra. I really think I will be a fan for life here, guys. I've never had such support in a bra.